9.9% of senior roles in Europe; 10.3% of senior roles in US; 12.8% of senior roles in Asia
with 10.5m American businesses owned by women, that’s only 40% of all private companies in the US, with only 3 – 5% receiving venture backing.

The question is what can we do to change this?

Last month the British Private Equity and Venture Capital Association (BVCA) saw some 150 women attend the Women in Private Equity (PE) Forum. The topics covered were ‘Recruitment and retention of women in PE’ and ‘Feel the fear and do it anyway’. Many other senior women in the industry and likeminded inspiring women shared their insights on how we can help encourage and empower women to consider and attain the senior roles.

As one of the Panellists here are my top five takeaways for investing in you

1. Mentor, Coach or Sponsor

a. Find a mentor or coach or sponsor
b. Decide what you want from them
c. Interview them for the role
d. Ensure you look outside your industry
e. Give back by mentoring others

2. Think knowledge and market yourself

a. Create your own mission statement
b. Identify what characteristics, strengths and skills you will need for your future career
c. Make yourself memorable
d. Be strategic in your thinking
e. Create a tag-line for yourself and market, market, market

3. Develop a positive attitude and image

a. Focus on learning and read positive and inspiring books
b. Recharge yourself (good food, good company, downtime)
c. Exercise (research has shown that the effects of 15 mins a day can last for 15 hours)
d. Look at each challenge as an opportunity in disguise
e. Be the best that you can be every day

4. Network productively

a. Ensure you have an updated profile whether you use Linkedin, Facebook or Twitter
b. Take part on online discussions in your sector
c. Acknowledge that networking events are part of the role of your job and enjoy them
d. Offer to help others first and show a genuine interest
e. Find the group that is right for you

5. Identify trends for new roles

a. Ensure you keep yourself abreast of the strategic business plan of the business both for the year ahead and the five year plan
b. Is technology changing in the business? How can this benefit you in a new role?
c. Ensure you are being more proactive and adopt roles that are facilitative and supportive which will help get knowledge to the right people at the right time (consider your team)
d. Look at how else you might be better placed to communicate, influence, coach or mentor and understand others particularly people’s strengths and weaknesses
e. Look at how you and/or your team can add value to the business

And finally ensure you have fun in the process – love what you do and do what you love. As Steve Jobs said;

‘And we’ve all chosen to do this with our lives. So it better be damn good. It better be worth it’

Click here to listen -

As the show discusses why women's voices are still not being heard equally Bernadette Boas, the host of the radio show and Shirley Palmer, CEO and Founder of Calmred™ discuss what women should be doing.

Defining who we are is very important however Shirley suggests that we address our FEAR as it can stop us doing or following through with what we want to do.

Fear appears to prevent a lot of women from stepping up, achieving and it is important that they take the risks, allowing themselves to learn from the experience and to overcome it and step up. FEAR can also be known as an acronym – False Evidence Appearing Real.

Women must focus on their three key natural traits whether in the work place or at home, or in the community and the importance of embracing them and sharing that knowledge with the younger women today.

· Nurturing

· Organisation skills

· Intuition

Shirley shared some of her recent experiences of clients who are in the corporate world and are unfortunately dealing with the issue of their ‘facetime’ in the office and that other members of the team or their bosses are not necessarily taking into consideration that they are getting the job done whether that means early morning or late night emails from home when the family matters have been dealt with.

Shirley stated there is a raft of women leaving the corporate world and becoming the new entrepreneurs so that they can work within their own timeframes. For those women, this is not about competing with men; it is about helping businesses be more focused, aligned and balanced. Women must allow themselves to be more authentic, have integrity and be true to themselves.

It’s time to make the change and embrace it!

Bernadette reminded the audience that in 'Lean In' Sheryl mentioned that her male mentor Larry Summers at McKinsey’s stated that ‘women need to assert control over their career’. We all have choices, whether you overlook your child’s play or a date night with your husband – it is important to define what is tolerable and your progression up the ladder.

And the final comment from Shirley was to ‘grab those opportunities’ – the importance of looking at where that opportunity might take you, looking at new initiatives and the importance of being able to share them with others and help the next generation of women climbing the corporate ladder or indeed being the new female entrepreneur and starting their own business.

You can listen to the show here

In the past a woman’s place was thought to be in the home – we have come far with women pushing up the ranks in the business world, but how much has that attitude really changed?

A recent report entitled “Sex and Power 2013: Who Runs Britain?”, compiled by Counting Women In, revealed how few women are advancing to senior levels in public life. The report outlines how women make up only 22.5% of MPs; 12.3% of council leaders (in England); and 17.4% of the cabinet.

Only a third of public appointments are female, as are 15.6% of high court judges and 5% of editors of national daily newspapers.

These statistics make for shocking reading.

Women are the great nurturers of society, they bring people together and they ensure we are nourished in more ways than one.

Add to this their amazing organisational skills, creativity and intuition, and you have to question why businesses today are not entirely recognising the value of women in the workplace, at senior management levels and on the boards of business.

Does society frown upon women who choose to be a Mum and subsequently make it difficult for women at work?

Are you one of those bosses who thinks – I can’t employ that young women just in case she is at that stage in her life where she wants to be a Mum?

It does seem that women are still being forced to choose between being a mum and actively pursuing a career.

In fact, many women are making the choice to put career first and put off having children until later in life.

According to the UK’s Office for National Statistics (ONS) the number of live births to mothers aged 40 and over has more than trebled from 9,717 in 1990 to 29,350 in 2011.

In 2011, 49% of all babies were born to mothers aged 30 and over, with the mean age of a mother at childbirth now sitting at 29.7.

This raises the question – can you be a mum and be a successful business woman?

Well, yes of course you can, but do we have to look at this as a black and white question and do women have to choose between the two?

Looking around me at the amazing women that I have come across in both business and in my personal life, the choices they make are as diverse as the women themselves.

You can be a Mum.
You can be a successful business woman.
You can be a Mum and a successful business woman.

In fact you can be all of these things and even more.

Take a minute and think about the people in your circle who don’t have a Mum. A young person who had to find their own way in life, didn’t have the Mum when they failed their exams, or achieved phenomenal success at school, or when their heart was first broken, when they didn’t get the job of their dreams, when they started their own business, when they got married…. Can you just for a second imagine what that feels like?

What about the people whose Mum has died? Now this I can personally speak about as my Mother sadly died suddenly at the age of 66 (a mere babe) almost 4 years ago. I am one of the lucky ones I am no longer saddened by the thought of her but inspired by the thought of her.

She encouraged me to live my dream, do what I wanted in life and in a way I know part of her lived her life through me.

What about the women who aren’t Mums? Are you one of these women? Do you feel society frowns upon you? Was this through choice? Did fate deal you this card?

There are many many thoughts here and I guess some people make the assumption that all women are Mums in waiting but that is really not the case. I cannot comment for the whole of society but I can comment for myself.

I am not a Mum, but yes I thought I would be one, for me I guess it was important to feel that I was a family unit and my relationships in the past didn’t depict that for me. I have many nieces, nephews, friends with children and several god-children, I love children and I strongly believe we have to foster children’s needs in today’s society which is obsessed with money and materialism.

We need to make a change, remind them of the simple values and the importance of relationships, families, good manners, respect and most of all love for each other – no matter what race, creed or culture.

Life is about choices and with the ONS statistics clearing showing us today that more and more mothers are having children later in life and choosing to work too. It is imperative to encourage today’s society to support these women not hinder them by putting a label on them.

Whether you are an individual or an employee think about how you can support the women in your lives or employment whether there are mothers or not!

A great leader must demonstrate the 3 C’s;

Credibility; the extent to which a leader has integrity
Consistency; authentic behaviour and reliability at all times
Competence; professional ability and expertise

The 3 C’s will encourage confidence and in turn trust.

‘The glue that holds all relationships together – including the relationship between;
the leader and the led is trust, and trust is based on integrity’.
By Brian Tracy

In the past we learned to trust our boss because they were ‘the boss’. Management maintained order and ensured things got done and we believe that they made the right decision with our work, our money and our future. They would also decide when we would get promoted, expected long hours with little reward. Remember when someone wants to control you they are showing a lack of trust. The more they don’t trust you, the more you don’t trust them – a vicious cycle begins. Businesses suffer; employees suffer with this type of mediocrity.

Thankfully the business managers and leaders of today are finally recognising the importance of leading through trust and not control. Encouraging team members to be pro-active, make decisions on their own merit and help build faith and trust in the team and therefore the business. Today we see leaders help businesses grow organically, promote more staff internally (rather than buy in) as they build up good training programmes for personal development and present more ways to communicate better with the employees.

Being a great leader means using the 3C’s to instil trust. Below I have noted some other ideas to ensure you help to lead through trust and not control.

• Share your business vision
• Support and encourage other team members to succeed
• Promote professional development
• Organise team-building events
• Don’t gossip and talk badly about others
• Have a positive outlook
• Encourage delegation
• Have an open door policy
• Empower your staff
• Share authority
• Ask for their ideas
• Make sure issues get resolved quickly
• Think holistically – your staff have lives outside of the business
• Don’t encourage rules and restrictions
• Hold yourself accountable

As Jack Welch said ‘Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others’.

Today I would like to challenge you to ensure your skills to be a manager include the ability to lead through trust, not control.  Give it some time and let your team rise to the test.  You will be glad you did, and so will your team!

The Plan

• Plan ahead
• Think about what promotions are best for you
• Master your current position
• Utilise your strengths and know your weaknesses
• Create an exceptional profile and appraisal / application (if you are looking for a new position elsewhere)

Lose the Fear

We all remember the saying nothing ventured, nothing gained. Remember it is only a job. If you always do your best – your best will be enough. Lose the fear and do it anyway. Make sure there are no reasons possible why you will not be promoted, for example;

• You lack the skills necessary for the position
• You lack professionalism
• You don’t take initiative
• You don’t take feedback
• You think like an employee and not a manager

See yourself in the new role and allow yourself to think how you would manage it differently

Present Positive Vibes

• Have a good relationship with everyone – you may not like everyone you work with
• Develop a positive attitude and outlook
• Be polite and courteous at all times
• Don’t gossip
• Be a team player
• Trust and respect your colleagues
• Be guided by your intuition
• Show off your personality but keep your personal life to a minimum

‘When a man has equipped himself by thought and study for a bigger job, it usually happens that promotion comes along even before it is expected’
by P. G. Winnett

Shine like a leader

• Think like a leader not a manager
• Inspire and motivate others
• Show and share your passion and belief
• Think team-building even if it is only for a drink after work
• Face change head on and look at ways to adapt
• Give recognition to the team when it is due
• Treat the team like your family

Learn new skills

• Groom a successor – share your knowledge and skills and teach others how to do it well
• Get a mentor or coach
• Ask for advice and put a strategy in place
• Decide what new skills you need
• Identity trends for new roles
• Learn steps to network productively
• Understand your business from the top down – what is the company vision?

Look and feel the part

• Ensure you are well groomed
• Ensure you are well dressed
• Ladies accessorise well
• Think of it this way – how would you feel if your bank manager was in a pair of jeans and a tee-shirt. Remember it is important to look the part and be respectably dressed for your position in your company
• Allow yourself to feel the confidence of that next role without the arrogance – bosses like people who see challenges as opportunities

Finally, maintain your integrity, your confidence and your efforts and you will get promoted.

Facts

Stress tends to be reported as one of the top three of self-reported work related illnesses in the world. In the UK, Europe and USA the median number of days away from work as a result of anxiety, stress and related disorders was 25. The cost to the world economy runs into billions.

What is stress?

In essence stress is an imbalance between the demands put on you and your ability to cope with them. Pressure can come from all sorts of places – from moving house to money worries to relationship problems but in most cases the biggest perpetrator is work.

‘If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn’t ask me, I’d still have to say it’
by George Burns

What’s happening?

So what’s going on in your body when you get stressed? Recognising a threat, your brain starts to release hormones. Your body responds by increasing the amount of oxygen and nutrients to your muscles, heart and brain. This ensures that you are primed to think and act quickly. It’s called the “fight or flight” response; your body is ready to fight off the threat or run away from it. Once the emergency is over, your body returns to a state of calm.

Short bursts of stress every now and again will not do you any real harm. However, if it’s prolonged or you have frequent bouts, your body will find it harder and harder to recover. This can lead to chronic stress.

Mentally, you may:

• Feel anxious
• Depressed or apathetic
• Have mood swings
• Feel tired
• Find it difficult to concentrate
• Lose interest in sex

Physically, you may:

• Get aches and pains in your muscles
• Get headaches
• Feel sick
• Have heart palpitations (feeling your heart thumping in your chest)

Any medical conditions you already have (such as eczema or asthma), may get worse as well. However be careful and aware as chronic stress can lead to serious health problems like high blood pressure, coronary heart disease and reduced immunity. The best way to deal with stress is to get back in control of your life.

Steps to help reduce stress

So the most important thing you can do on a daily basis is to take steps to address the stress in your life but don’t forget to think about your partner, your children, your friends and the extended family. Help recognise the signs, help yourself and help them. Below I have list some key steps to deal with stress.

• Limit distractions
• Eating a well-balanced diet will make you feel good about yourself
• Regular exercise is a great stress buster
• Don’t take on more than you can cope with – remember to say no!
• Delegate or share responsibilities – especially at work and home
• Be more organised
• Pen and pad and get it out of your head
• Eliminate interruptions
• Allow yourself quiet time and space
• Go for a walk
• Listen to music
• Talk to a good friend about how they deal with it
• Learn to relax
• Take up yoga

If need be consult your GP and they will give you valuable support and advice

‘We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are’
by Anais Nin

Remember short bursts of stress every now and again will not do you any real harm but pay attention to over-doing it. The body will always present itself with what is going on in our inner world so listen to what it is telling you and act. Use the positive aspects of stress to help motivate your life!

‘Educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all’ – Aristotle

 What do we know about the heart?

It is compared to a pump that keeps blood moving around your body. It delivers oxygen and nutrients to all parts of your body, and carries away unwanted carbon dioxide and waste products.

Statistics

Heart disease is the number one cause of death for both men and women in the UK and United States, claiming approximately 1 million lives in the US and claiming 90,000 in the UK annually.
By 2020, heart disease will be the leading cause of death throughout the world. 

Types of heart disease

There are different types of heart disease but below I have noted a few of the most common ones.

• Coronary heart disease is the most common type of heart disease and can lead to sudden death from a heart attack.
• Arrhythmia an abnormal heartbeat is common and not always dangerous.
• Heart murmurs – about 30 per cent of children have an innocent heart murmur.
• High blood pressure – hypertension increases the risk of a heart attack.

Prevention

There are lots you can do to keep your heart healthy no matter what age you are and remember it impacts on children too.

• Taking exercise.
• Eating a healthy diet.
• Encouraging children to be heart healthy.
• Lose weight.
• Control cholesterol.
• Reduce blood sugar.
• Living a stress free life.

And being aware of dangers such as:

• Smoking.
• Drinking.
• High blood pressure.
• Stress.

Whether you give of your time or money or your abilities please consider the various charities listed below, big or small they are all supporting a great cause and they need your support. You might also want to consider organ donation, a challenging but a very giving process to share your heart with someone else when you die.

Further information:

The British Heart Foundation is the nation’s heart charity. Their vision is a world where people don’t die prematurely from heart disease. They will achieve this through pioneering research, vital prevention activity and ensuring quality care and support for everyone living with heart disease.

http://www.bhf.org.uk/

The American Heart Association started with the goal of improving health by educating the public on how best to live. Their mission is to build healthier lives, free of cardiovascular diseases and stroke.

http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/

The Hand on Heart Charity had a simple goal in March 2010; to prevent the deaths of the 12 young people who die due to a sudden cardiac arrest each week in the UK. Today their goal is to continue to educate schools the importance of having a defibrillator on their premises.

http://www.handonheart.org/

What does love mean to you?

You could be excused for remembering Lord Alfred Tennyson’s poem which said:

‘It’s better to have loved and lost than never have loved at all’

Or

‘If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were’

 By Richard Bach

As we go through life we find many different types of love captures us, even consumes us and makes us think and feel the strangest emotions that we all consider ‘love’ until the day we die.

It can be the love of:

• A parent.
• A sibling.
• A friend.
• A first love.
• A first husband/wife.
• A first child.
• A first job.
• A first home.

And the list can continue but we often associate it with people and things and this is where it is important to look at understanding the difference between conditional or unconditional love.

Conditional Love

This tends to be perceived as love that is only given depending on x, y and z. If you do this for me I will love you. It might be a partner or a lover or in fact it can just as easy be a child who says “If you buy me a new iPhone Mummy I will always love you”. Love can be seen as a bargaining tool. There is always a condition and an ‘if’ in this equation.

Unconditional Love

In essence this is love with zero conditions. This love that has no limits or boundaries, it doesn’t dictate or possess, it is freely given without any expectations of receiving in return.

Having recently read Dr. Gary Chapman’s book called ‘The five love languages’ I can highly recommend it, whether you are exploring your current relationship with your husband or wife, or your partner and even if you are single. He has an enlightening way of making you think and you might even end up surprised by your own needs in a relationship.

He defines the five love languages as:

• Words of affirmation
• Quality time
• Receiving gifts
• Acts of service
• Physical touch

And explains how we can meet each other’s deep emotional need to feel loved. In addition he has also written one for children and for teenagers.

Love of Life Itself
Do you look at your life and say you ‘love’ it or do you just ‘like’ it or feel that you are content with it? Would you like to wake up every morning feeling inspired and ready to take on the world? Well I have learnt that the most important thing to do is make the decision to change it. Stop procrastinating and saying I will wait till a new job comes along or I will feel better when the spring arrives or I will start my diet after the weekend. The time is now, take a leap of faith and choose.

‘I have found that if you love life, life will love you back’ - Arthur Rubinstein

Think about what you would do if you knew you couldn’t fail. Start with the baby steps and allow yourself to look at life in a different way. Just take a day at a time. It doesn’t need to be rushed.

As Mark Twain said ‘Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.’

Love Nature

Personally I think one of the most amazing things in the world is the earth itself. Just looking at the amazement of nature, how it goes from season to season, how plants grow, how the animals live – the sheer wonderment of it all. I often feel that an early morning stroll, or a walk in the park or even a stroll after dinner and allowing your eyes to look around you at nature, seeing the perfection of a leaf on a tree, the vivid bright yellow of a daffodil in the park or listening to an owl hoot or the high pitched sound of a bat at night is incredible.  It also has a wonderful way of grounding us and reminding us how small we are in this amazing world we live in.

So this Valentine’s day think about all the aspects of love albeit I have only named a few. Show love for your friends, family, loved ones, nature, your food, your body, your work, your colleagues, a stranger, your home but most of all make sure you love yourself.

‘In the end, it’s not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away’ - Shing Xiong

’Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish‘ – John Quincy Adams

What makes you impatient?

Is your life chaotic?

Are you always in a hurry to get somewhere?

Are you over-stretching yourself?

Is it particular words, events or people that influence you?

Do you see patterns?

Explore your impatience

Write a journal and explore over a one or two week period what causes you to be impatient.

Look at the patterns.

See how you can change them.

Maybe it is about letting certain things go.

Consider delegating more.

Lose the need for control.

Evaluate your results.

Develop patience

Now that you have looked at what makes you impatient, explore your patterns and let’s look at how to develop patience.

Slow down.

Practice thinking before you speak.

Eat consciously.

Consciously spend – think about that next gadget or shoes or handbag – do you really need them?

Benefits of patience

Better decision making.

Happy and healthier due to reduced stress levels.

Healthier bank balance.

Develop better understanding.

Gain compassion.

Become more kind-hearted.

Gain empathy.

Appreciating the importance of timing and growth.

The benefits clearly identify a reason to think about and review what makes you impatient. Explore it today!

As children we are taught the importance of right and wrong, and yes and no. How different do you think the world would be if we gave our children the chance to explore themselves? In my childhood we didn’t have the opportunity to discover the world at large via the World Wide Web but I feel this is more about acknowledging and understanding the right to choose.

Life is about choices. Choosing your education, your career, your partner, your home, where you live, whether to have a family or not, having a pension, investments, enjoying a happy balanced life.

Take a moment and ask yourself who influenced your choices?

Knowing what you know now would you have made a different choice?

Or are you at a stage in your life where you are choosing again?

Is it a new career?

A new partner?

A new home?

A lifestyle change?

‘Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity’ – W Clement Stone

I implore you to think the next time someone asks you to help them; take on their work; give them guidance; support their cause – take that extra few minutes and consider it carefully before answering.

Ask yourself how do you feel about it?

Do you feel angry?

Do you feel anxious?

Is there uneasiness in your body?

Are you wondering how to fit it in?

Are you looking for their approval?

Are you staving off disapproval?

Maybe it is time for you to acknowledge your personal power and to learn to say NO more often. Being able to understand and accept the value of your time, your talents and more importantly not dissipating your energy. When your energy is pulled in too many different directions the body falls out of kilter and our well-being truly suffers.

Why not consider the next week as an opportunity to learn to say NO. Remember it does take 21 days to break a habit and 21 days to make a habit but seven days is a good start. Watch and see the changes in your life by saying NO. See how much additional time you have available to finish your own projects, to let you have some down time and to not feel every day that life is so rushed you can’t wait for the weekend to have some chill time, enjoy feeling more relaxed.

Life will continue even though you say NO, they will always find another way to do what they needed doing. It doesn’t matter whether you are a parent, a boss, an employee, a husband, wife, partner, lover there will always be a way.

Allow yourself to think about your happiness and remember by saying NO you allow yourself time to assess when you can truly say YES. Value yourself enough to make the choice.